I think sometimes we forget we have a choice. I was listening to a podcast by my coach the great Rich Litvin and one of his clients said, “well I already started the project and have put effort into it so I need to keep doing it.”
To which Rich told her that “just because the ball is rolling doesn’t mean you have to keep pushing it.”
This really had a profound effect on me. I had convinced myself that when I got the ball rolling on something I needed to keep putting effort into it even if it was not something I was completely a hell yes on anymore.
How much energy and time I have wasted doing things that initially were good to see how they pan out but then when i realized they were no longer good for me or my family I would keep giving my precious time and energy.
How many extra things do you do just because you did them before. “Oh well, that’s just how things are. If you start it you better finish it.” This is the stupidest fucking advice ever. Well since you started the bottle of tequila you better finish it. Well since you started that shitty relationship you better stay in it until you are completely miserable. Well since you started that negative overbearing environment job make sure you stay there because there aren’t 1,000 other ways to be employed.
This old bull shit mentally of in the box stay inline thinking is what has so many people miserable, unhealthy and stressed out. And the most powerful part is it only takes one shift. Once we realize we can actually choose what we want out of life instead of life telling us what it wants out of us we open the door to possibility and slam the door to being a victim.
Here is a great tool I like to use with my clients. Take a piece of paper and at the top on the left side write “Ball Rolling”. On the right side at the top write “Why I keep pushing it.” Now underneath the “Ball Rolling” column look at the activities that make up your week and write them down. And once that is complete under the “Why I keep pushing it” write down your reason for wanting to continue the activity.
This easy exercise helps empower you to keep doing what you want and eliminate the bull shit that you don’t. Once you eliminate what you do not want, you can start to create what you actually enjoy.
